Facebook Made Me Lonely

Sara McInerney
Facebook Made Me Lonely
1-29-13

Today in class we all admitted something we already knew about each other, our friends, events and pictures on Facebook, aren't really real. After reading the article title, "Is Facebook Making Us Lonely?" I could immediately relate. I have been guilty of scrolling through my feed of my friends while I was bored or staying in for the night. The thing that I look at most while on Facebook would definitely be pictures. I usually don't care too much about how mad you are your boyfriend dumped you, or that the one millionth like on a random status will cure cancer and how many points you got on Farmville, I always grazed over my friends pictures. What are they doing? Where are they? Who are they with? Was I invited to that party? Did I even know the party was going on? They're dating now!? She looks slutty or he is hot. All these things would go through my head while looking through the latest pictures my friends updated. I made snap judgments and then promised myself, next time I had something to do or post, I would make it a big deal.

The whole time, I was so jealous of what they were doing, who they were hanging out with or what was going on in the pictures. When I was in my senior year, even my freshman year of  college, I took TONS of pictures after scrolling through my feed, I wanted to make sure they knew what I was doing, who I was hanging out with and that I was having the "best time ever." I was obnoxious. I am sure my Facebook friends dreaded every time I uploaded because from each significant event in my life there would be at least one hundred pictures. And by significant  this could mean something as little as drinking at a friends on a Friday night. Even from those nights, hundreds of pictures.

Now that I look back, I know I was obnoxious. No one cared that my friend Joey made a funny face while taking a shot or that Lauren and I took 15 pictures with 15 different poses. But I did it because Facebook makes our lives a competition. It's a place to show how great of a family you have, how hot your boyfriend is and how crazy your weekends are. And the comments and likes only drive us to keep going, to upload more and to consistently do so or the ugly truth comes out, we are clearly lonely if we aren't actively uploading.

Finally, into my sophomore year of college, I realized how insane I was acting and how annoying I was being by uploading so many pictures. At the end of my first semester in sophomore year, I made a promise to stay off of my Facebook the week before and week of finals, and you know what, I didn't know what everyone was doing, or how much fun my friends at home were having or that my friend of a friend starting dating this guy who's name I didn't even know, and it was the best thing I ever did for myself. What I did know is what was going on in my REAL friends lives. I found out through conversation before a class that one of my friends parents were going through a divorce. We had this conversation because I wasn't staring at my phone while on Facebook and I wasn't scrolling through endless pictures from the weekend of someone who I had just met this year, I was talking to real friend who needed me. After finals week, I didn't even have the urge to get back on. I wanted to get out and do something picture worthy, but not one hundred pictures worthy. Since that year, I have uploaded minimal pictures to Facebook and I cannot remember the last time I made an album of pictures, I simply do not upload enough. Instead, I have started scrap booking and making real memories with real friends.